Often times we ask ourselves questions such as, “Why are most men unfaithful? Why do I attract the wrong type of men? Why do I fall for the “bad boys”; the immature, emotionally unstable type?” When the real question we should be asking ourselves is, “why do I keep ignoring the redflags?”

You see, the problem is not that you attract the wrong type of men. The problem is that you choose to ignore the warning signs; you choose to accept the unacceptable behavior; you choose not to leave. So the problem is you, babe. You are choosing not to give yourself any worth by accepting less than you know you deserve. This is why you constantly end up dating lowlifes, the unfaithful, the “bad boys”, the immature, emotionally unstable type.

But yet the question is, why do we end up ignoring the redflags? I believe it’s because of fear. Fear that we will end up alone. Fear that we won’t meet someone better. Therefore, we settle for crumbs; we start telling ourselves crap like “giving up is not an option” or “love endures all things” or “I will love him through the good and the bad”. Listen sweet child, when a man chooses not to respect your beliefs, does not give you the value you deserve, and is being abusive in any kind of way, physically or verbally, then you need to quit the “I love him; ride or die” nonsense. Start loving yourself first. Give yourself some worth. You deserve the world and more. Don’t let anyone make you feel like what you’re longing for is too much to ask for.

Bottom line, stop wasting precious time dating the wrong men. If you have to stay single for awhile, then so be it. Start investing in yourself – your body, mind, and soul, and eventually you’ll see how everything else will fall perfectly into place.

D. Arelis XO